Venting

Finish the store, get shows. Those are the biggies that need doing. They deserve first billing. Thems is also the ones that, well, that I’ll work on later. Procrastination? You betcha! Nothing but the finest for my fears . . . I might get to the store sooner than later. Today will not be that day.

With the creeks and groans emitted from my body this morning, you’d think it was a haunted. Add to that my drug of choice, coffee, is out in the house. I have decaf around from a failed experiment a numerous amount of months ago. I am trusting I will get by alright. My skepticism taunts my trusting nature. I don’t know what to believe.

I’ve been at this for a number of weeks now. I need to take inventory of what the hell I’m doing. This morning has me feeling . . .”Down” isn’t the word I’m looking for. “Irritable” might be closer to it. We’ll blame the decaf coffee. Anywho, what the hell am I doing? I am blogging. Daily. Am I blogging well? I guess so, it’s better than nothing. It’s a nice way to let others know I’m alive and that I am working. I can also see where a reader can get bogged down and bored with the pedantic personal details of it all. Of course, there are readers out there that savor the pedantic personal details. Guess I’d better find them.

I’m good on the art. I’m painting and drawing regularly. The activity boosts the self esteem quite well. It does come with it’s concerns, though. The business aspects always bog me down. Wondering how to make a buck and how to gather and hold an audience is daunting. Among the cacophony of voices vying for attention these days. The advertisers, the ambitions young’uns, activists, news; I do not have nor do I want the bombastic skills held by the best of these groups. I can respect the skill, but I’m alright without it.

Truth be told, I’m doing fine. I’m just being melodramatic. I’m in a venting way. This is me blowing off steam. I would like to go through this journey with a confident stride. Handling adversity and doubts with a practiced aplomb. Truth is: none of us get to do that. Not until we’re actually practiced at facing those problems and confident in how to appropriately respond. Be the challenges daunting or not, we still have to face them and do our best is ever we are to succeed.

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